Pursuing My Husband's First Love
That deep?

POV Medina

"Mariam ... ?"

"Mizan ... ?"

The person who haunts my household is in front of me. Did ya? Mama Okta is the Mariam I was looking for, Mariam who always cried in my husband's dream, the woman who became my husband's first love.

They were silent to each other, seemingly as surprised as I was, suddenly nostalgic. I ventured to break the moment between them.

"Mas Moses ...."

Suddenly Mba Mariam entered the house not clear what she said, then Mba Mariam closed the door no matter we were still standing in front of her.

"Mba Mariam ... ? Please open the door!" I'm ready for an explanation.

Many times I called, but Mba Mariam did not budge, until Mas Musa took my hand, telling me to stop.

"Already on Deck, let's go home!" bring Moses to me.

Why am I sad? Seeing Mba Mariam treating Mas Musa as indifferent. I witnessed my husband's own meeting with the figure in his dream. Mba Mariam's attitude shows that, not only Mas Musa who has not fully released the past, Mba Mariam was the same, meaning they still have not let go of each other. I saw something broken in Mas Musa's heart, it turned out that Mas Musa's feelings for Mba Mariam were much deeper than I thought.

Mas Musa and I kept quiet, and our plan was to go for a walk. Even this afternoon rain is proof, we are not allowed anywhere, or this rain is a sign that they must meet and talk to each other.

My body trembled, various kinds of prejudices and conjectures flashed freely in my head. Moreover, seeing the effect of the meeting on the change in attitude of Mas Musa, he was silent and daydreaming a lot, the look on his face made me not dare to ask him a word.

Mba Mariam is married and happy, which means that it is impossible for Mas Musa to leave me for his first love, but whether with his heart, I feel that I have been seen by him.

I saw Mas Musa's hand tremble as he held the teacup in front of him, my tears were shed to see Mas Musa suffer so much. I should how?

"Mas ..," I drew near to him, unable to bear to see Mas Musa, who I had always raised his degree, fall like this.

"Sir, I'm sorry ... !"

"Is it painful to meet Mba Mariam?"

"Ehmm, no Deck, I was just surprised, sorry ... !"

'Bohong ... !' my inner.

"Let's meet Mba Mariam, finish what's unfinished between you, Mum!"

"Not Deck, hemm there's nothing more that needs to be done everything is done."

"What if Mba Mariam feels the same way?"

"Here the Deck, Mariam is happy,"

"Mas was afraid that it would disrupt her domestic life, right?"

Moses was silent, yes, he was thinking that way, but Moses forgot that our household was always haunted by Mariam.

"Mas said Mba Mariam was with her husband in Batam, why is she here?"

"It looks like my friends lied Deck, they covered up where Mariam was, or indeed Mariam didn't want to be found."

"In fact we even met Mba Mariam here Mas?"

Moses took a deep and heavy breath.

"Don't think that kind of Deck, all coincidences. Mariam is happy means everything is completely finished, already Deck, mas will focus on our lives, same you Deck!"

There was a lie that Mas Musa was trying to do, not about lying to me but lying to himself.

"Mas, would Mas love me like Mas loves Mba Mariam?"

Moses looked at me, tears could no longer be held. It is painful to accept the fact that Mas Musa still loves Mba Mariam very much.

Moses hugged me, trying to ease the cries of a wife he might not have loved. I, who fell in love with him the first time I saw his face, had to go through a tremendous pain.

There, on the other end of the net of the man I love, were shedding tears that added to the tightness of my heart. Mba Mariam, why is it so hard to love someone who loves you, it feels like I am also hurt to feel the pain that Mas Musa felt.

Moses wiped away his tears, and also mine.

"Mas will love you Dek, deeper than Mariam, mas promise!" mas Musa said with a smile, a smile that always makes me captive

"Bissmilbornohmanirohim ... !" said Mas Musa.

Musa gently kissed my forehead, continued with both cheeks and emptied into my still trembling lips. From the gentle rhythm of changing fast rhythm as Mas Musa's heart rate increased, I began to reply to him even though my heart knew, Mas Musa only vented his aground feelings with Mba Mariam to me.

It felt different, my husband was not like the usual Mas Musa. His movements, his embrace, his breathing, his heartbeat and his touch described him wanting me the most at the moment. Did Moses imagine me as Mba Mariam?

Mas Musa did it while crying, although Mas Musa tried to hide it from me but his sobs seemed to come out without Mas Musa could control, all mixed with the roar of breath when Mas Musa touched me. It hurts a lot, it's not written with words!

We did it in the living room, not as usual, Mas Musa always took me to the room. But it seems like this time Mas Musa forgot because it had been overrun by something that exploded in him. I'm avenging everything, even though I realize the explosion wasn't for me.

'I want you Mas, even if I have to be this sick, I want to!' I lament in my heart.

"Thank you Dek, love you!" mas Musa said after our ritual was completed and his passion was channeled, again he kissed my forehead.

My heart broke into pieces, sick, until I could not answer. What kind of relationship is this?

I immediately got up to the bathroom to clean myself up, no! To cry. I lighted the shower to wet my body, I sat down below it contemplating my fate, I shed my tears to my satisfaction. It's not easy to look okay.

Tok .. tok .. tok ... !

"Dec, what's wrong with you?"

"No Papa Mas, soon Medina is finished!" I hurried to finish my bath.

The next morning I went back to Mba Mariam, many times Mas Musa took my hand, Is he trying to find strength from a wife he has not loved?

"Mas feels, I've dzolim to you, Dek."

"No, Medina tried to understand what Mas felt, and not our marriage based on mutual sincerity and pleasure, Medina promised to accompany Mas through any problems, and not to do so, origin Mas did not intend to leave Medina anything will Medina live."

"Subhannalloh, what a noble heart Dek, mas so ashamed of yourself. Somehow I have to apologize to you."

"Love me Mas, that's all Medina hopes for!" Moses didn't answer, he just kissed me.

I ventured to knock on the door of Mba Mariam's house, I was ready to face whatever was going to happen. I am Medina Khafiza the wife of Moses Hamizan will not complain for the path I have chosen.

Mba Mariam came out with her husband, and I was very surprised by Mba Mariam's very reasonable attitude, unlike yesterday. A happy roar emanated from her face, even her husband welcomed us warmly.

Mba Mariam, if you'd known the suffering I'd have to endure.

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