Pursuing My Husband's First Love
Thorns in Marriage

"Your mother's a good man Dek." Moses looked closely at me, he took my hand and held it tightly. His eyes pierced through the window of my heart sharply, I was still disappointed and clueless, whereas moments of closeness like this were the things I had always longed for.

"Thank you for everything you've done, and know you're trying hard to protect Mariam" Mas Musa said.

'Protect Mba Mariam? So Mas Musa thought all I did was to protect Mba Mariam?' inner wondering.

"But believe me Deck, I will definitely understand without having much explanation if He sees for himself how Mariam is really," continued Mas Musa by continuing to look at me.

I just fell silent, swallowing disappointment. If Moses had known, I would have been so afraid that Mother would have separated me from Moses. I'm not protecting Mba Mariam, I'm protecting my own marriage. But Mas Musa's point of view is only about Mba Mariam.

Mas Musa's gaze always managed to make my heart beat out of love. But right now, it's like I'm losing my way of deceiving myself, the beatings are no more. Melisa's words really haunt me, they first become lovers, so what's the point of being the first wife?

"Mas ...," I said to him, I must ask, has he loved me after all that I have sacrificed?

Suddenly, Moses hugged me again, "Sir, thank you for always doing your best, watching yourself how you love me, serving me as a wife, and sacrificing so much for my happiness, it reflects how your parents educated, how your mother educated so that created a Medina who is good and sholihah."

I was so shocked I couldn't say a single word. Moses let go of his embrace and his hand turned to slip my hair into my ear. I just ducked avoiding her gaze, even though my burden was so heavy but her treatment managed to make me blush.

"An angel-hearted wife like you must have come from a mother with a very noble heart Dek" she added.

As perfect as I was before his eyes, I was perfect with all my sacrifices. The way I love is by sacrifice, and Moses loved me for my sacrifice. I smiled withstanding the pain.

"Thank you" I said in the end.

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Adhan Dawn's incantations woke me up, I saw Mas Musa still resting on his alphabet. Last night's conversation made it difficult for me to sleep, I must have just had a good time before dawn, so I did not realize Mas Musa who woke up first.

I got out of my bed withered, my head holding up a heavy load to make my neck hurt. I went to the bathroom, the very cold air pierced until it was colder than usual, maybe my cold heart was so contagious everywhere.

I chose warm water to refresh my body, hoping that all this pain would flow with the water, and evaporate all the disappointments and sorrows that Mas Musa could not bear to see.

"Cieee keramaaas ...," said Melisa who had been waiting for me in front of the bathroom.

"Huuusst .. You are Mel," my sergeant was surprised by his sudden appearance.

"Hihihi .. so want to spit up Deh's marriage," he added while continuing to tease me.

"Little children talk about mulu marriage, selesein used to go to college," I said as I passed.

I smiled at Melisa's ridicule, if she knew I was shampooing in pain instead of touching, would she still want to rush into marriage? But it felt like dejavu, remembering when Mas Aaron caught Mas Musa who had taken a shower and mocked him with a loud voice until his father and mother heard, even Mba Mariam heard.

I let out a long sigh, as it was a sweet memory on a bitter, albeit slightly embarrassing day.

"Why Deck? Smile themselves?" mas Musa asked, I did not realize there was a smile on my lips because I remembered the moment.

"Hem .. That, Melisa almost slipped," I replied.

"Let's worship!" take Mas Musa, I immediately grabbed my face and positioned myself behind Mas Musa.

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Sure enough after Mas Musa departed Mother returned to her desire to meet Mba Mariam. I only thought of a few possibilities, would Mother hurt Mba Mariam with her words? Or will you tell me to leave Mas Musa?

"Okay, ma'am, let's go to Mariam's Mba's house." The curious mother seemed pleased with my answer.

"Well, what's so hard?" grumbled mom.

"But ma'am, don't mention Mba Mariam's late husband, that's all I'm asking for."

"Lha I just want to know what kind of person she is! Why are you so scared, son?" my mother said up.

"Okay Ma'am, sorry Medina ya ... Medina knows you're doing all this out of concern for Medina," I said guiltily, as I rarely raised her tone.

"Hhhh ..," Mother breathed a long breath as she passed, "Mom get ready first" he added.

Melisa and I followed Mom to get ready. Once ready, I choose to take Melisa first and then later return and pick up Mom. The only vehicle was a motorcycle, although it was near impossible for me to let you walk.

"Mel, come on in" I'll take Melisa.

"Accoland ...." I knocked on the brown door a few times.

"Waalaikumsalam," replied someone from within, "Eh ... Aunt Medina, please come in, Mama Oktanya is inside," said Desi Tea kindly.

"Why is Desi Tea here so early? Did Mba Mariam open the stitches again?" many wonder.

"Oh .. not Aunt yet, but hopefully soon. I'm just mama Okta" replied Teh Desi.

"Did Moses ask for it, Tea?" ask again.

"It's not Auntie, Mama Okta who asked," he replied again, I must understand.

"Oh yes Tea, leave my sister for a while well, her name is Melisa. You know, I have to pick up my mom first" I said in a hurry.

"Eh, Mba ...," prevent Melisa who has not been comfortable with new people.

"Oh ready Aunt Medina, let's go first Mba Melisa," asked Desi Tea to Melisa sounding faint in my ear, I rushed off to pick up Mom.

It didn't take long for me to come back and take Mom. My mind floated everywhere, guessing what was going to happen. I squeezed my hand before I brought Mom in.

'Bismillahrrohmanirrohim, ' I said in my heart.

Melisa was sitting waiting for us on the sofa, and Mba Mariam was sitting next to her, while Octavia and Desi Tea were sitting on the carpet in front of the television.

"Waalaikumsalam," replied Mba Mariam and Melisa simultaneously.

"Mba .. hem, introduce this to my mother and sister, it happens that they are visiting me so all of you want to get acquainted with Mba Mariam." I'm trying to simplify things.

Mba Mariam approached Mom and reached out her hand to shake hands, Mom accepted but when Mba Mariam was about to kiss her suddenly Mom rushed to pull her hand.

The look on Mba Mariam's face was very surprised, she tried to cover it up by allowing us all to sit down. I feel bad for Mba Mariam, actually she has not received the marriage that I have forced.

"Ehem, so you've been honeyed at my son's wedding?" mother opened the silence.

"Mother." I gently patted my mother's folded hand on her lap, I was surprised to find her trembling hand.

"True, exactly Medina made me honey" replied Mba Mariam.

"He did that there must be a reason" Mom later said.

"Keep, you want to know why? You can directly ask your own child Mother," said Mba Mariam firmly.

"You must have seduced her husband, until finally my son gave you up to marry so as not to commit adultery!" accuse Mother, Mba Mariam looks angry while I am helpless because of the speed of their dialogue.

"So that's your answer, Din?" Mba Mariam asked me back.

"Not so I mean, Ma'am!" my sergeant.

"Without diminishing respect, you better go than you come just to make a scene here," expelled Mba Mariam, she no longer even looked at us.

"Fuck you!" maki Mom.

"Anything?!" the Mba Mariam.

"Mba, it's Mba, come on Mom, we better go home!" I stood up and pulled my mother's hand.

"Wait!" prevent Mba Mariam, "You think you can come and go as you please to insult me?"

"Listen, Mom, all this time your daughter just kept chasing me, she asked me to meet her husband and talk about our love story that I'd thrown away, even my husband got carried away with his game and asked me to agree with your daughter's wishes, he hurt himself by ruining my life" Mariam told Mba.

"Mba ...," prevent me.

"Even when my husband's burial ground was still red, he slylyly brought his mother-in-law to propose to me, when my grief had not yet recovered, when the wound in my soul was still gaping, while I was still trying to digest this poignant reality, she .. your daughter again did everything she could to make me honey!"

Mba Mariam's voice trembled yet firmly implied her suffering. Despite her anger she managed to strip me of her words. My tears just flow, my heart hurts so much to realize the reality of myself through Mba Mariam. Mother was no less surprised, but she seemed to be at a loss for words to reply to Mba Mariam.

Melissa tried to calm me down, while Desi Tea who noticed this commotion rushed Octavia out of the house. Tears also adorn the face of Mba Mariam, how deep is her love for her late husband? Am I really being rash? Shouldn't they be happy because they can finally be a match? Did my sacrifice cause new suffering for Mba Mariam?

I was more and more stunned to realize my inability to see the great love of Mba Mariam for her late husband and finally forced the marriage. No more voices, only my cries and the simple sobs of Mba Mariam.

"Mom is satisfied?" mba Mariam asked, but Mother only looked at trying to avoid Mba Mariam's gaze.

"I'm still grieving and your son has sprinkled salt in every wound, and look now! He even brought his family to sprinkle salt and make me suffer even more."

"Enough, Mba! I beg!" I said, "I'm sorry for all my mistakes, but Demi Alloh, I don't mean to make Mba suffer, everything Mba says is true, I don't argue, I did everything, I did everything, but I mean well not as Mba alleged," I said trying to defend myself.

"Why should your family accuse me of seducing your husband?" ask Mba Mariam.

"That's just a misunderstanding, Mba!"

"Already, already!" between my mother, Mba and I Mariam compactly turned to look at Mom.

"Now it's clear, it's Medina who forced the marriage and you don't want it, do you?" mother explained the situation.

"Because marriage is undesirable, it would be better for you to get divorced soon!" continued Mother.

"Astaghfirullohaladzim ... Ma! Don't be like this" I said in surprise, Mba Mariam was as surprised as I was, but she said nothing.

"Other things you want to keep? Obviously your honey refused, and you can come back happy with your marriage without thorns" said Mother.

"No way Ma'am, although Mba Mariam rejected it but after all Mas Musa loved Mba Mariam, I did all this for the happiness of my husband, how could my marriage be happy if Mas Musa alone was unhappy?" I panicked so much that I said too much of what I should have saved.

"Try explaining!" ask Mom, I immediately realized my mistake.

"Bu .. ridhoi this marriage, one day Mother will understand what I have done, ridhoi our household Mom, my blessing of choice," I pleaded.

Mom and Melisa looked at me with pity. From the beginning I was the one who came to Mas Musa who had been pierced by thorns. Even as the thorn continued to hurt Moses, he still loved him. Mba Mariam has stuck her love like a thorn, although she eventually had to be hurt for the loss of another love. But, he had long been gnawing at Mas Musa with his love.

"So, your husband did get hooked on him?" ask my mom again.

"It's not so, Mom!"

"Already! Let Medina ask her husband to divorce me!" said Mba Mariam welcome my mother's wishes.

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