Pursuing My Husband's First Love
Who's Mariam?

POV Moses

My new life has begun, after successfully completing what I have dreamed, I am again preparing to realize what I have planned long, long, although I have lost someone who was once a goal, this is a renewal.

Long before my return my parents had prepared a soul mate for me, they guaranteed the woman's dignity, much less what I was looking for, after the only dream I dared to hope for, was to fall, to die, destroying some of my spirit and determination to get better, I dare not hope again, let Allah bring a soul mate without having to look for it.

Medina khafiza the woman I have no doubt about her kesholeh, the result of the silent selection of my father and also my uncle while I only accept what has been their choice, Insha Alloh is good. Although deep in my heart still harbors the pain of my parting with Mariam, I must continue to step away from the naive story I had hoped for, following in the footsteps of Mariam who had far gone before me. And here I am, expecting Medina as my companion and my way out.

After that wedding, I deliberately chose a city that Mariam couldn't possibly be there, perhaps.

It's a good step to find a good life, as good as the life I believe Mariam belongs to, no matter where she is. The last time he sent me a message to end our relationship, he didn't want to be a wedge to my dreams, not knowing what was really going on until he thought he was a wack, he should have realized he was my spirit and my purpose. No more news about it, all seemed to disappear until my best friend, Hadi, told me that Mariam was married and immediately taken to Batam.

I hope Medina is the cure for my pain, my wife, my future, my purpose in life, the mother of my children. I will love her so that my feelings for Mariam will soon be drained away. After the long education I had was not able to educate me to remove the wrong feelings, I hope that my married life lessons with Medina will be able to remove them.

That night I had just finished with my class, Medina usually sent a lot of messages but today there was not a single message from her. I intended to give her a little surprise gift, but I didn't know what she liked. After circling the road home, I decided to buy him a sweet martabak with a sprinkling of chocolate and cheese.

When I got home, Medina always greeted me with her smile, at first strange but over time I got used to it. But today Medina seemed less appetizing to smile, I don't know maybe she was tired, but with the discourse Medina still greet me, and also has prepared my needs.

"Well, will you take a shower or a drink first?"

"Bath first Deck, this mas buy martabak if you don't like the taste tomorrow and buy another mas ya."

"No papa Medina likes it anyway," he replied flatly.

I went straight to the bathroom to clean myself, all prepared by Medina, warm water, towels, and a change of clothes.

After I finished and felt refreshed, I approached Medina in the kitchen busy preparing dinner for me.

"Abouuww ... !" suddenly Medina who was 5 steps ahead of me shouted.

Seen hot water spilled and hit his hand, I immediately grabbed his hand and poured it into the sink to flush it with cold running water.

"Aren't you papa, Dek?"

"No papa Mas just got a little, this is going to make tea for Mas Musa."

"You don't have to sit down and make your own," I asked Medina to sit in the living room.

"You, if there's a problem with the Deck's story, don't put it on your own," I knew Medina was thinking about something heavy, I swiftly took the medicated cream and rubbed it into her hands.

"No papa Mas, Medina was just worrying about something."

"Worry why, Dek?"

"Medina can really say it, Mas?"

"Of course you can, it's my duty to listen to your complaints." I sat beside him, looking deeply into his eyes.

"Medina is worried that Mas is not happy to marry Medina" he said, looking down he might be uncomfortable with my eyes, what kind of question is this?

"Why are you suddenly asking such a question Deck? Is there something wrong with me?"

"Certainly happy Dek, why ask like that?" I started to get confused and guess what Medina had in mind.

"I'm sorry that Medina was presumptuous, but who was the woman whose name Mas always called in sleep, until Mas Musa often cried her in the third night?"

"What?" I was surprised by the question, "Whose name is Dek?"

"Almost every night Mas always delirious while mentioning a name, until Mas sweat like a person who dreams very bad?"

"A name?" I asked either Medina or myself.

"Mariam ...," replied Medina.

You're right Medina, it's a nightmare I wish you were the way out.

"Wait, explain slowly Deck, Mas don't understand."

"Almost every night since our wedding day, Medina often heard Mas deliriously and mentioned Mariam's name, so Medina wished Mas to be honest with Medina who Mariam was."

I was drowning, trying to think as clearly as possible to compile my answers, to compile my heart, and also to search for Mariam's true position. I saw Medina's eyes, there were dried up tears in her eyes, which meant that she might have known a lot. Without me realizing I had hurt my wife, even she refrained from asking questions from the first day of our marriage.

"You angry, Dek?" ask me to make sure the situation and a little time stalling from the interrogation.

"No ..," he answered.

"Want to?"

"Medina was afraid that Mas would not be happy with Medina, and was afraid that Mas would leave Medina," he continued, following a sobbing that I was sure was sincere from the bottom of his heart.

Subhannnohm ....

I reflexively hugged her, calming her from the fear of loss. She was unlike any other woman, some of whom would be angry when they found out her husband mentioned another woman's name while sleeping, but not with my Medina I was more convinced by the soul mate God gave me, Insha Alloh my wife is my adornment as a sholeh wife.

"Mas won't leave you Deck, sorry you accidentally made your feelings hurt, Dek."

"So, what's Happy?"

"Of course happy mas, mas ridho Medina Khafiza as wife mas."

"Sorry Mas, Medina is already shu'udzon and very afraid of losing you, Mas." I let her cries explode as I gently caressed her head.

'Oh ... Mariam, is that clear as I say your name?'

"Mas is happy and very grateful for the fate of Allah, having you as the wife of Dek, sorry if mas has not been able to be a perfect partner and has not been a good priest for you, he said, so are you happy too, Dek?"

"Medina is happy Mas, Medina must be happy if Mas Musa is also happy ...." Medina smiled as she wiped away her tears.

"So, who's Mariam, Mas?" ask Medina later.

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