Pursuing My Husband's First Love
Make Peace With the Situation

I look at those who are happy, the decision that I made can no longer be kunego. Ah, I see, my parents have started to age, how could I possibly be back to burdening them? Although materially Mas Bian left quite a lot of savings, and my convection business is quite promising. But, the burden of thought must have remained on my parents' shoulders.

Is this how my mother freed herself?

"It is better that the marriage contract is carried out as soon as possible," said Ms Aini, even though this has been too fast, what needs to be accelerated again?

"Have you arranged, ma'am" answered my mother, disappointed me but my mother refused to accept my disapproval. Wh why?

"Mba Mariam, thank you." Now it was Medina's turn to look at me with wet eyes.

"Congratulations, yes!" said the man I finally remembered his name, he was Mas Harun, Mizan's brother.

"Thank you, Mariam."

If they all knew, my heart would be buried with Mas Bian. In fact, the heart filled by Mizan was also dragged to death with my soulmate.

"I'm doing this only for Octavia."

Finally, after the discussion that I didn't want to hear, they finished saying goodbye. I'm just resigned, just my mom's busy discussing this and that.

"Mba ... My son, Mariam ...." I burst into his arms, releasing this cry, once again.

"Are you mad at me, Mba?" my mother asked as her fingers gently rubbed my head, what can I do, I chose silence.

"Actually, I've discussed this proposal with your father and your father-in-law, they said it would be better if you had another husband, we all know how bad you are now, Mba, you know, you can't accept reality yet, even you tend to blame God, worried mother."

"Is it going to be this fast, ma'am?"

"Alloh who presents your soul mate faster, prejudiced is fine with Gusti Alloh, I know you are grieving, but too mourned also mas Bian kasian, right?"

I tried hard and wiped my tears. Right, my cry will aggravate the path of Mas Bian. I should be able to, let it go.

"You are still shaken Mba, who knows her son Bu Aini can make you rise again, for the sake of Octavia."

"All right, Mom." I took a deep breath.

"But is Mba really? If that Miss Aini's son has liked you for a long time?"

"Yes ma'am, we were dating, but broke up."

"Yes, even good, your soul mate is not far away Mba."

Why should I be angry, Mas Bian's accident has nothing to do with Medina and Mizan. With or without his appearance, Mas Bian's accident will still happen, because it is destiny.

But, they were like laughing on my pain, they took advantage of the calamity that befell me. Medina, what made you do all this?

.........

The wedding day arrived, just 2 weeks from our conversation the other day. Mas Bian's family was also present, there was my Mother and Father-in-law, ah, my former in-law, should I mention that? Their eyes were puffy, but the smiles on their faces were blotchy.

Am I the only one unhappy here?

"I accept the marriage and marriage of Mariam Maulidda bint Mr. Maulana with the dowry, cash!"

"How are the witnesses?"

"Alhamdulillah!"

My tears fell with the prayers of my loved ones, my family and my new family. I looked at the smiling Octavia on the lap of Mas Bian's mother, there was absolutely no grieving on my side.

I'm dealing with Mizan, my new husband, my first love that should only be a memory. Our eyes intertwined with each other I lowered my head to grab her and kiss her hand. My heart was claustrophobic as the memory of my wedding moment with Mas Bian returned to revolve in my memory.

Then Mizan grabbed the top of my head and kissed it, “Allahumma inni as'aluka min khoirihaa wa khoirimaa jabaltaha 'alaih. Wa a'udzubika min syarrihaa wa syarrimaa jabaltaha 'alaih.” After that he moved to kiss me on my forehead.

My heart is numb, Yes Alloh, my feelings have really been buried with Mas Bian. There is no pleasure or palpitations like a newlywed.

"Smile, Mariam! Not for me, but for all who are happy for this marriage" Mizan whispered gently to me.

His gaze was warm but my heart was still frozen, I thought back to a long time ago.

"Mariam .. uhibbuki!" The cool scenery typical of the hills is a witness to teenagers who are in love.

"Uhibbuka ..," I replied timidly, after which we turned around and ran away from the place, such is the ridiculous story of my past. The following days we spent exchanging letters, praising each other and expressing love in characters, or simply telling stories about our daily activities.

All continues until High School, our minds are firmly intertwined because the characters that intercede for the root of this love. We are never really alone in any situation, we always involve others when it comes to meeting. The thumping of our love gushed all in narrative form, the more thumping, the deeper, and the more comfortable.

All the 'cie-cie' from my friends I enjoy and accept, I like it. They think this love is just a joke. Until he finally chose to leave, far away, and for a very long time. It made me wait and then disappointed.

"Wait for me Mariam, I will definitely be back for you soon!" promise me.

Now he really comes back, we have both grown up, the problems we face are no longer PR Mathematics or Physics, nor Nadhom memorization that must be a weekend deadline. Polygamy is the biggest problem.

I forced my lips to curl a little into a smile, I succeeded, though it looked stiff.

I tailed behind Mizan, went around shaking hands and asking for blessing. I saw Medina with wet eyes in the corner, did it be easy for Din, seeing your husband chanting the qobul ijab to another woman? Why did you force it yesterday?

All congratulate, give advice, and also pray blessing. Should I hear everything? I knew no one was really standing on my side.

Mizan paused for a long time on his wife, I did not care if I chose to turn around and look for the whereabouts of Octavia. The little girl was joking with her eyes.

"Mrs ...." She hugged me, I replied tightly, I did all this for her.

"Mama, Okta has a new Papa? Now Okta's got Mama, Papa, and Mommy, huh?" ask Octavia innocently.

"Who says dear?"

"Said Mother Medina," she said as her small hands pointed towards Mizan and Medina, not only the adults that Medina poisoned, now my son is the same

"What is Okta seneng?"

"He'em ... Okta seneng really Mah, Eyang Okta is also now a lot."

His smile was broad, but he was very close to his father. Now he's happy.

'Are you also easy to forget about your papa, son?' my inner.

Suddenly Mother came and whispered her words to me, "Be at peace with the state of Mba! With yourself!"

....