Bad Feelings
Shocked

What should I do if problems keep coming in front of my eyes alternately? Because her stupid behavior and attitude only brought me into danger many times. And how am I supposed to behave like a fool if I'm the one who's scared by myself?

$$$$$$$

Both of mom's eyeballs looked at me confused because I was like a caught thief. I chose to turn my gaze to Jojo looking for answers to the questions that came to my mind, about how he could enter the house with my mother and Jojo just nudged it by shrugging both shoulders. "Where are you in a hurry, huh?" mother asked when she saw me running down the stairs.

My breath was a little stingy because I just ran like a fidelity. Yes it is true, the demon now put on the face of an angel and sat there sweetly. Take a few breaths before answering a question from the person who really makes me not to the heart of lying to him. "Oh..go to church" fortunately I'm the smartest at hiding expressions.

"Now?" ask again. I nodded my head. "Your friend is coming, accompany me first. I went in to make you a drink" she told me.

"Oh, yes" I said. After the death of my mother who disappeared into the kitchen immediately I approached Jojo and sat next to him. "What are you doing here? Didn't I tell you to wait outside?" manya.

"Your mother saw me at the door, greeted me and asked me what business was there and who was it? Because I don't want to lie so I said, if I wait for my brother and I'm going to church together. I didn't say anything about our relationship. I'm just saying college friend's sister" said Jojo. His expression showed fear that I would get angry and even worse get him to break up. Although I used to have a desire to do it, but not for now.

Kuhela breathed a long sigh of relief hearing his explanation. "Good, aaa. Anyway don't reveal the truth before our relationship is really serious"

"Okey" he said as he nodded his head many times. I don't know why I doubt her answer. Who does not doubt the boy who always wants to act?

"Sorry only this is at home, taste yes son. Rya never took anyone else home. Except for her best friend Erna. So it's just surprising to see you standing in front of the gate" said the mother smiling kindly to welcome this uninvited guest. Please, don't ask me anything more. Stop it and we go to church now, I asked in my heart.

"Eum...Mom, it looks like we have to leave now. Because the church that we want to go to the streets is often jammed. I don't want to be late" I said, preferring to leave rather than get questions I didn't want out of my mother's mouth and I couldn't answer or lie to her.

"Why go to another church? To our church only" said the mother.

"Andwee.." I suddenly cried. "Eum.I mean, don't ma'am. Someone will talk weird. Anyway, Jojo his church is not in line with our church. That's why he's awkward again. Isn't that right, Jo?" I follow Jojo's arm. I'm just a little improvising the truth to make it more believable.

Jojo nodded. "Yes aunty, the religious flow is a little different. But I can understand it kog. It's okay to come to your church" As my eyes glared at Jojo looking for accountability for the words that just came out of his sweet lips. I really can't believe Jojo's obeying my mother's words. Damn this brat, he's planning what else now?

"Good then. We'll go together" Mom's reply made me want to jump free from the 21st floor building.

The five of us went to church together. Eva, Ninoy and mom got on the bike together and inevitably I hugged Jojo's ninja bike which tortured the passenger a little.

"Can you use your motorbike next time? This bike is too dangerous for me" I protested.

"No danger" said Jojo who looks happy when forced to stick my body on his back. He won a lot. God fucking.

"Yes to you, but to me this is a great pleasure" I said frankly. Just this time I stuck to him without any barriers.

"What is the loss? I have also felt it" he said frankly.

Shame was immediately created on my face. "Stop your rant. You better speed up the road, we'll be late" I said.

"We must be careful, was not the mother sister advised to slow down do not speed" he said as if to be a submissive child.

"Ish..you are this.." Come on, I better give up anyway the distance between my house and church is only 10 minutes. So it's better to let this boy enjoy what he wants now. I just need to think about the answers to the questions that might come up later after church. Or is it better that I run away first before the others are aware of the existence of this one alien?

Jojo's motorbike stopped at the church parking lot. I got off the bike immediately. Tidying up my white dress and slightly messy hair, combing with my fingers. Jojo has also come down. I saw the mother, Eva and Ninoy had entered the church, shaking hands with the receptionist who greeted them at the door. Oh My God, why is he the usher in front? My head turned to look at Jojo who was still tidying his hair in front of the rearview mirror, damaged by the helmet he was wearing. Should I leave it or ah, I'm stressed.

He's Samuel, a man I admire a lot in church, because of his passion and enthusiasm he glorified God, making me one of his fans. I dreamed of being her lover when God would let me. But what is the power of our distance is too far and there is no possibility of chemistry between me and Sam. Maybe because we are different tribes he is of Chinese descent and I am of Javanese descent, which is usually very difficult if together.

But still I don't want him to see me with Jojo. I'm why, huh? Why don't you want others to see me alone with this gesrek boy? My egoism?

I still feel upset and angry for now. It was Jojo beside me and Samuel who greeted us in front of the church. If only he wasn't at the door, I wouldn't be this sorry. My friendly face is gone. Oh my God, can't the man in front be replaced by anyone else. Please don't him, I don't want him to see me with a man. Right, I was still expecting it a little, despite the fact that I already had Jojo as my lover. I'm sorry if I'm still expecting Samuel's attention. I'm sorry Jojo, I haven't been able to take you seriously as my sidekick. I'm mistaken.

________________*****_____________