Can I borrow your womb?
May I Borrow Your Womb 47

"Oh my God, what am I supposed to do? Should I leave this house?" I'm talking to myself.

How am I supposed to calm down if Adzam still meets Hanum? What did Hanum mean to send their friendly photos to me? Hadn't Hanum and I made a pact to get Hanum out of Adzam's life, but in fact Hanum couldn't get tired of snaring Adzam's body to keep coming back to him.

I didn't give the house to Hanum, instead I asked Hanum to take care of the divorce papers. Then what does all this mean?

Oh God, do I deserve to be happy?I want my heart to leave this house. It's meaningless that I'm staying in this house. Hasn't my pride gone down since. For what? For who?

Just for mama's sake, just for mama's happiness, only for my mama's return. But I can't keep this up. Adzam still loves Hanum. What does Bintari mean between us? Did Adzam forget that he ever wanted to start a new life with me and Bintari?

I wiped my tears, enough of this game. I'll start my new life with just the two of you, both of you. I'm sure I can support Bintari much better than now.

I put Bintari on the bed. I composed Bintari's equipment, none of Bintari's left behind. As for me, I only brought a few pieces of clothes.

The bag and suitcase are now neat. I put a jacket, and a hijab on Bintari so as not to get cold.

It's time to open the door.

Bintari was sleeping in my arms. While both my hands were dragging the suitcase and bag.

There was mama, Ririn and also Mas Adzam who was staring at me,

" Where are you going?" Mas Adzam blocked my hand strong.

" Detach! Don't ever touch me for this second and next!" My cynical.

" What the hell are you?"

Mas Adzam is playing his part well.

" This.." I showed you the photo on my phone.

Mas Adzam was very surprised, his face turned pale.

" It's not you?" My quips are sharp.

Mama took the phone in my hand.

Without hindering my mother, I could see their appearance on my phone.

" O Allah Adzam!" Mama screamed loudly, the next second she hit Adzam's head.

" The child is immoral! What are you looking for from a bitch like her? What less is your wife, Adzam?" Mama was roaring like a possessed person.

" I'm sorry Afi, ma." I feel guilty for making my mother feel devastated and disappointed.

" I'm sorry Adzam, ma..." Adzam tried to ask for forgiveness from his mother.

" Why doesn't Dance make you change, Adzam?" Huu......

Mama like a child who is not getting a toy is still roaring.

I took a deep breath, I heeded my ears from the sound of my mother's crying. I tried to blind my eyes, so as not to go back.

I pulled my bag and suitcase past them.

Ririn was chasing me, "Mom, don't go!"

He was fond of me.

I stopped my footsteps, "Rin, you won't understand, later after you get married, you'll understand what you've been feeling all along."

I stroked his shoulder. Ririn kisses Dance.

My online taxi has arrived. The driver arranged the things I brought.

Mas Adzam came out of the house, "If you want to go, please go! But don't bring Dance. He's my son."

I don't know why my emotions were re-ignited to hear the words of Mas Adzam. I stepped forward near the time of Adzam,

" your child? When I was pregnant, where were you? When I need you, where are you? Don't ever be a hero of misfortune between me and Dance."

I left the mas Adzam standing by.

The car door has been opened. I went inside, as I was about to close the door, my mother ran from inside the house.

" Afi... Don't go! Mama can't separate from Dance."

" Mama, mama's still a good grandma for Dance. But Afi can't stay in this rymah anymore. The wedding cannot be continued. "

I closed the door and the car glass.

" Road sir!" My speech.

This car left the area of my mother's house. The tears I held immediately poured out. My chest felt up and down considering all the trouble that was going on.

O Allah.. Maybe this is just the soul mate that you have laid out for me and Adzam. Let me enjoy this solitude.

I booked a hotel room. For a while I and Tari will rest in this hotel. And tonight I was thinking, where are we going.

*****

Morning has come, After preparing today I will go to the terminal.

I plan to settle in a village. This time my heart was broken. I tried to forget the shadows of Adzam, Hanum, Mama and Ririn.

Terminal's still quiet, I've been on a bus. Goodbye wounds, goodbye memories, goodbye good people. Today I will start a new life. May there be a rainbow after the storm hits my life.

I chose to go to Riau, in a small village filled with oil palm plantations. Only with KKN capital first, I can know this village. And now I'm back in a different time.

The friendly people made me feel no trouble finding a rented house.

Finally, Bintari and I can rest in peace. A simple rented house, adjacent to elementary school, so I was determined to sell small so that my savings would not run low.

The huft! There is a sense of relief because I used to not have fun, I always set aside the shopping money given by Mas Adzam without his knowledge to store at the ATM. And in this urgent situation I still have a budget I can use.

Living in this village is so peaceful, without signal, and the electricity is still dead at midnight.

" Mas Adzam, thank you for making me this steel. May you be happy with Hanum." I murmured slowly.

*****

(Short story yes.).

I haven't lived in this village for five years. My tears have never shed while I'm here. My phone is still stored neatly never used because there is no signal here.

Dance has always been healthy, even this year she has entered kindergarten school.

Dance, the encouragement of my life, who has always been my friend in losing happy or sad.

Every day my routine is selling yellow rice in front of the house.I started to gain weight and that means I am happy.

I only think about my mom once in a while. Is mom okay?

Ma, if we're destined to meet, I'm sure we'll meet someday