Choosing to Let Go
episode 32

Cicha POVs.

When and where it came from, suddenly Keyndra was sitting in front of me. The moment after the break bell rang I saw him go out of class in a hurry.

I chose to stay in class. Niken, Erika, and Marina were with me, but because they were hungry, they went to the cafeteria.

I only occasionally glanced at the man who was now sitting in front of me, without asking him where he was from and what he was doing. I don't want to be stamped as a possessive girl. If he wants to tell you for sure he told you without me asking.

"So fond of reading novels, that I'm not considered?" ask Keyndra. I was reading a teen novel, one in which the male lead could make me fall in love.

"Banget!" reply spirit.

Keyndra put a funny looking lower lip in my eyes. "What are the benefits of reading a novel? Who has halu doang?"

Instantly I closed the novel I was reading, choosing to focus on the guy in front of me who is now my girlfriend. "I'll tell you, let's make us know. Continue by reading our insights become broad. Can add vocabulary, can train the brain to think critically, especially if the storyline is a puzzle, difficult to guess. And there are many more benefits of reading."

Hearing my excited explanation, Keyndra just nodded her head, whether she understood what I meant or not.

"Keep in the novel you read that many cogans?" ask again.

"Don't ask me if that's it" I replied.

"Beautiful, but not real. It's in front of you there's a real." Keyndra said as he pointed to himself.

I could only hold my laughter because I heard her words. It turns out he's funny when he's jealous.

"Narshish," I said, hitting Keyndra's arm.

"The truth is, it's handsome."

"Yes.." I was cut off when suddenly a girl came up to us, rather approaching Keyndra.

"Key!" call the girl then without permission to directly embrace the neck of Keyndra. I saw Keyndra was mediocre, not resisting or looking uncomfortable at all.

I know the girl's name is Sandra, she's also third grade, but different classes and majors. Sandra class XII IPS. I know him well enough, but only know him. From the beginning of first grade, she was the only girl closest to Keyndra, even now. But I don't know what kind of relationship there is between them. But when many others call them lovers, they strongly oppose the statement.

My heart throbbed as Keyndra turned and smiled sweetly at Sandra, the smile she had shown me for months.

Finally I chose to duck, I could not see their closeness further. Before I was Keyndra's girlfriend, I was often hurt to see their closeness, especially now when I became her lover. I was all my strength holding tightness in my chest. And to cover it up I reopened the novel I had read earlier.

"Teach me mathematics dong Key, Lo kan IPA children must be sabilah," pinta Sandra.

"Now?" ask Keyndra.

"Yes, last hour of his math lesson. Mumet me if you have seen the numbers," said Sandra with a slightly spoiled tone. I can even see now that the girl is leaning on Keyndra's shoulder.

"Lo's bottom is aja males," ledek Keyndra slightly humored Sandra's forehead while chuckling.

I don't know why I don't like hearing Keyndra laugh at all. Maybe it's because he's laughing not for me? Can I not be selfish for now? I have a right as her lover, forbid her to laugh for another girl.

"Come, come with me to my class!" take Sandra with you while pulling out Keyndra's hand. Is my existence invisible here to him?

"Bent on, "hold the Keyndra. "Ay, this is Sandra. Surely you guys have introduced? three years one school may not be familiar, although different majors." Keyndra made me raise my head and stare at them.

I smiled at Sandra in response to Keyndra's words, Sandra smiled back at me. Maybe Keyndra thinks I don't know who that girl is yet, because it's only now that they've been that close in front of me since I and Keyndra were in a relationship. But with their closeness all along, who doesn't know Sandra.

I just smiled awkwardly at Sandra's words just now.

"Can not use violence, you do not know yourself emang Louh," said Keyndra while rubbing his head that had been hit by jitakkan from Sandra.

"Just a friend?" sandra asked as she pulled down her eyebrows at Keyndra.

I tried to smile at the scene in front of me at this moment. Although in fact my heart feels tight. Sandra's a pretty girl, she's also the cheerful girl I've known all along. Physically, she's every guy's dream girl.

"Udah yuk, rush into Key," Sandra again pulled Keyndra's hand.

"But San," Keyndra held back again.

"What's Key again?" sandra asked annoyed at the porch to pluck her lips.

Without the cue Keyndra immediately took my remaining half bottle tea after I had had a drink and drank it. "I'm thirsty" he said, smiling widely.

Sandra was seen widening her eyes, then the girl directly hit Keyndra's shoulder. "Vomitin Key!"

Keyndra complained in pain, I myself was confused to see Sandra's attitude which I thought was excessive.

"It's just a little bit, San," said Keyndra while avoiding a blow from Sandra.

I myself am like someone who is watching directly lovers who are fighting. Who am I considered?

" You can't have a sweet drink like Key." Said Sandra who made me turn to Keyndra. Indeed, all this time I only saw Keyndra drinking water or bottled mineral water.

"This is a child if you have a sweet drink like that is immediately coughing, Cha," said Sandra turned to me who just kept quiet from watching them.

I wanted to say something, but at once Keyndra coughed.

"What did I say too?" sandra said while giving the head of Keyndra.

"Gue is thirsty" protested Keyndra.

"But, you can buy first to the cafeteria, you don't have to drink sweet ones either. I knew I couldn't drink like that, so stubborn Lo." Sandra kept nagging, then she pulled Keyndra to her feet.

"Sorry, Ay, I'm staying. Promise is just broken. She was fierce, more fierce than my mom" said Keyndra before she left with Sandra to leave me alone.

I could only smile smirkingly holding tightness in my chest. We have been in a relationship for more than just friends. But in fact there is not much I know about the figure who is now my lover.

I don't want to ask a lot about her, because I don't want to be considered a possessive girl or kepo. Or he who I thought was closed to me all this time.

I only know and know his parents. But not for the other brothers. Even about what he shouldn't drink, I just found out.

In contrast to him who knows everything about me. I didn't want to cover anything from him from the beginning. Because trust and honesty are important in a relationship, I think. But he doesn't know himself.

for almost three months, Keyndra never explained who Sandra was to her. What he's got to do with Sandra. When I asked, Keyndra just said they were just friends. In fact, I once with my own ears heard someone say I was the third of them.

Can I be suspicious? Can I doubt him? At a time when such a scene I saw even often, even though now there is me who became her lover.

But I could only endure the tightness, enduring the pain in my heart. My mouth seems to be in protest, to be angry, to say I'm jealous I can't. Say I'm stupid, stupid for love. I want to curse myself, but I want to be selfish with myself. For now I still want to be with him, I can't afford to lose him. For now I still want to fight. But I don't know, at a time when I was tired.

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