Bitter Tongue In-Law
60. The Pain That Returns Touched

"Let me take Cashel. You just bring the bag." Bian followed Nuna's footsteps as she walked towards her only child's room.

"A lonely house, where are people going?" ask Bian while putting Cashel to bed slowly.

"Maybe they're going to sodara's house. Someone's getting married in a few days. Near the old village."

"Aren't you coming?"

"No, I'm pretty much the same mom. Who will run the same shop?" Nuna spoke with her busyness to pull out Cashel's wet clothes into the tub. And she came into the kitchen to make drinks. He realized that his steps had been followed by Bian, but he was silent as if he had allowed the man to follow him.

Bian watched the woman who was busy preparing drinks for him. His eyes did not blink at all when he saw the woman's face, a face that made his world seem distracted with pain that had stopped for so long.

Until this moment, he never thought he would fall for the figure of Nuna who he knew was simple and always he was a stupid dwarf. A careless woman who always acts rashly without thinking about the risks she bears, even when her condition brings life other than her own life.

"Why did you bother yourself? Don't drink, we just got back from the restaurant. We better talk about something else that's more important."

"What else, Bian? You didn't cape what?" Nuna asked as she walked towards the living room.

Not yet able to reach the living room, Bian pulled a woman's hand and he leaned Nuna's back against the wall. Both of his hands surrounded Nuna's body so as not to go anywhere.

"You still have an explanatory debt. What made you cry?" Bian's gaze was sharp, but his radiance did not disappear.

"I'm not crying, why is it still being discussed?"

"After what happened you still did the same? You know I'll keep asking before I get an answer."

"Why don't you let me calm down? What has passed is not to be discussed." Nuna put away her hands and walked back to the living room.

"It is precisely because you cry to meet Arga that indicates you have not calmed down, you have not recovered from your past. If you're healed there won't be any reaction to meeting your past."

"No human being is completely finished from his past, Bian. I'm not crying because of Arga. It's just that I'm heartbroken to see him being so loyal to his new wife. I hurt, I used to have to spell to buy my own needs. I have to skimp on meeting the needs of me and Cashel while I have a husband." Nuna's tears broke again

What a pain that somehow can not go from his heart. A lot of heartache caused by Arga. One of them is trust, up to this moment and somehow until when he was so clueless and unable to accept the attitude of Arga who did not believe him at all at that time. He was too deifying his mother until every sentence that slid from his mouth without thinking long he was.

Bian put himself next to the woman. He let out a long breath before his hand moved to gently stroke the woman's back.

"Your life is much better now. You can do anything yourself, your hardships are over, please don't cry for her. I'm the same as you, I haven't really recovered from someone in my past. But I never cried again, it would only make our wounds wetter. Look at me, Nuna." Bian slowly opened Nuna's hand which covered her face. The woman was still as excited as the red and puffy eyes.

Both of Bian's hands cupped the widow's face and looked at her in the shade.

"Never regret anything that has passed. Whatever happens is your choice and there is God's permission in it. Anyone and anything that happens in our lives will always be there for us to take his lesson. Because your Arga becomes stronger, you become more independent, you get better. Don't be weak anymore just because you met her."

I don't know what Nuna felt at that time, she just felt she was too strong. It had been more than seven years he had a hard time but he never had a shoulder at all just to put his head down for a while. And at this moment, when Bian gave a sentence that made him calm he was eager to do the simple thing that was lost all along.

The desire that he could only let out through the look of his eyes, he did not have the guts to hold Bian even if only a few seconds.

"You can cry today, but not tomorrow. And the next days, whenever and wherever you meet Arga, do not show your weakness. Can you?" Bian's thumb wiped away the tears that had been spilled. It hurts so much to see Nuna crying over her past.

Nuna nodded to Bian's request. He himself did not know why he had to cry over the past and the man, who he knew felt hurt and he let out through his tears.

"Here, let's be quieter. You must miss this." Bian carried Nuna's head to her broad shoulders and hugged her tightly. He never thought it would be answered by Nuna.

You confuse me, Nuna. Sometimes you give me hope, but sometimes you make me lose hope.

After a while hugging each other, Nuna took off the hug quietly.

"Thank you for making me calmer."

"Aren't you bored every time you say thank you? Let's just say that's how I make you happy. I can see the source of my happiness shedding tears especially for the sad."

"Why are you doing this, Bian? I think with what you have will make it easier for you to find a good life companion. A woman who has never been married, can keep her chastity for her husband only, can...."

Nuna stopped speaking as Bian's index finger stuck to her lips.

"I was easy to find the person you mentioned earlier. I don't even have to look for many who are obsessed with me. But what I'm looking for isn't that. I seek comfort, happiness, purity of heart, and all that I find in you. It's up to you if you judge yourself to be dirty, everyone dirty on the portions, nothing sacred. Ye know? It's like I found something when you said that a husband is a wife's dress, and vice versa. Very rarely do people apply it. Many may know the phrase, but not everyone is willing and able to run it. And I found it in you. You're different from the others to me, Na. I also used to think that this was not love. But if this isn't love, why hold on to this moment? Even my race is not for you, make Cashel too. It was like finding a new family. You may not be sure of my taste, but please, don't stop me from proving it."