You're Changing, Mas
Silent, Lonely and Alone

Afternoon came, but Gibran did not return home. It was half an hour before he came home from the office. But it's okay, I'll always wait patiently for him. Until magrib approached, Gibran also never came. I called him many times but there was no answer from him at all. Again my body went limp and bad thoughts began to interfere.

Until now night came, I waited patiently for my husband. I prepared the dish I cooked at the dinner table, just in case Gibran ate it when he came home. I hope tonight Mas Gibran doesn't disappoint me. Where I've been obedient to my husband at his command, but if he still hasn't changed, then he's no longer appreciative of my struggle to make our household happy.

"Lift dong, Mas!" I murmured while trying to contact my husband.

Honestly I'm really upset because I called her number so many times, but there's no answer at all. Though, my call was connected to her mobile number, but there was no one answer. Maybe Gibran did this to me. Bad thoughts always come when something like this happens.

"Where are you, mas? Please, don't let me down for the umpteenth time" I've given up on contacting him.

A few hours passed, and it was 9 p.m., but Gibran had not yet returned home. I was crying so much. I sobbed, hurt and grievous I felt. The tightness in my chest filled my wounds. The night is getting late, honestly I'm so scared because now I'm alone in a house this big.

Silence makes my hair goosebumps. Silent, lonely and alone. My mind is starting to get so bad. Though Gibran knew that I could not be left alone in a very lonely house, but he instead let himself be outside all day until this late.

I'm so tired, so I stick my head on the table while not stopping looking at my phone screen, hoping for a notification or call from Gibran mas, until I unconsciously fall asleep there, I fell asleep, in the dining room with some dishes already available at the table.

I am so comfortable in my sleep, like finding peace, warmth and happiness. At least expel the fear that has plagued me since.

"I love you, baby. My heart aches when you think I'm an evil husband. I'm sorry, yeah. Know that I love you very much. Nothing has changed from me. My love is always for you."

CUPS

CUPS

CUPS

"I love you so much, baby!"

The voice I so longed for sounded soft in my ears. I know him very well. Yeah, that's my husband.

"Mas Gibrannn!" I got up and shouted to her name.

My eyes wandered around the room where I was. Dear thousand dear, in fact there is no one around me, empty and silent. I just saw a light coming in around the room. Then who opened all the curtains, and all the servants did not live in this house anymore? Did Gibran do it?

I immediately took my phone and saw the clock was showing at 7 am. I was so frustrated, I cried when I found out that Gibran was not in our room or in our house right now. Maybe Gibran's been going to his office since.

"Why can you let me sleep outside alone, ma'am? Even the food that I provide you also do not touch let alone you eat a little, hiks.....," my cry sobbed.

When I chose silence, I had a hidden lightning bolt. I am patient. But better not test my patience. A patient wife always obeys her husband's orders and never hurts or fights her husband.

Is not the fruit of patience success? For I am sure that when God creates sorrow, there God creates happiness. When God creates difficulties, there God also creates ease as in His promise.

Sometimes it feels heavy heart if you always have to give up on your husband, but that is something that is our duty. We must always train and practice to give up. Because giving up does not mean LOSING, but by giving up is actually one of the glory of the heart of a wife who wants to crave heaven as a proof of her patience.

But this time I was really tired and wanted to take a short break, letting my mind calm down from this complicated matter.

"Alright, if this is what you want, ma'am. I will go for a moment to calm my heart and soul that are wounded because of you" I murmured softly.

I want to see how important I am to Gibran. Whether he's gonna find me or even he doesn't care about me. I wish Gibran's mas was only saturated for a moment with me. If it continues, then our relationship is already on the verge of collapse.

I packed my clothes as necessary. I walked out of the house after I locked the door. Yes, because I still have the right and mistress in this house. I left the house without a message or a letter to my husband.

"With my departure, I hope your heart melts away and be aware of your treatment of me. I also hope you'll find me, mas."

I stared at the grand and large house building in front of me. I remember my memories of Gibran when he first brought me into this house after we got married. He bought this house as our wedding gift. I was so happy then. I don't feel like my tears have just flowed down my cheeks all the time.

I got into the cab I ordered. The plan was I'd stay at the hotel for a few days, depending on whether Gibran was looking for me or not. I go not to leave, but I need a solitary space to reflect on everything that has ever happened between Me and Gibran.

"Go sir, I'll tell you the location of the destination" I asked while choosing the hotel I'm going to.

"Okay, ma'am" the taxi driver drove his car.

There will be a time when the patient becomes fed up, the caring person becomes a fool, the loyal person becomes a leg up. That is when his patient, caring, and loyal nature is not appreciated.

Everyone needs to be rewarded for their struggle. The choice is that he becomes happy because he has been appreciated or becomes an inner wound because he never feels appreciated. Because what makes a person disappointed is when his efforts are not appreciated.