Night In Istanbul
An Restless Soul

After college hours, we stopped by the minimarket for a few snacks. Various snacks ranging from savory, spicy to sweet filled our shopping cart.

Finished shopping we immediately headed to Intan's house. From returning home from campus, shopping for snacks in the minimarket until the trip to the house Intan my head is still full of question marks over the attitude of Mas Ryan.

(Okay if Mas Ryan had no quota, but why was this morning and reply via chat is not the same as usual? )

(Is it true that I am too sensitive and thoughtful? )

(What is it that usually when a married couple enters the marriage age above five years will change like this? )

(Did I ask Tina? )

(But Tina's husband from the beginning has changed. And Tina is )

I took a long breath. This fix may be too sensitive and not used to the change in attitude of Mas Ryan. All this time, our marriage was fine. Anyway, when I get home, I can ask Mas Ryan. I tried to calm my mind.

Tina and Intan who had been quietly watching me, were now relieved to see me smile again. They are still reluctant to ask questions. Looks like they know that this has something to do with Mas Ryan.

"do you want to stop by my house, too?" Take me.

"not for Ana. I'll go straight to Intan's house."

"iya Na, I took Tina straight to my house. But if you want to go home first, that's okay. Near this. Just two different buildings."

"yes, I'll go home first. Put the bag down and change clothes. Take a book to do the job."

"indra Raya also Na. I've long since Indra didn't play at my house."

"yes, I haven't seen Indra in a long time either. How old is Na?"

"this year is six years old Tin. The printers again."

"okay Tan, I'll bring Indra as well."

The weather is hotter today than it was yesterday. The road from the stop to the house of Intan and my house feels more tired. Every now and then we wipe the sweat with a tissue.

"duh, finally arrived. The distance is the same but how tired does it feel?" Intan complains.

"because it's hot today maybe yes. So quickly tired," Tina still wiped her sweaty face.

"Na, then yes. We both want to go in."

"okay. I go home first. After it goes straight to your house, Intan."

Intan and Tina simply nodded and directly opened the boarding door. I walk back. After two buildings arrived at my house. I immediately held the doorknob. How shocked I was at the locked door.

(How are you locked? Did Ryan leave? )

(If you're going, why don't you tell me? I usually say. Go to the minimarket by the way )

(It's a good thing I brought a spare key)

I immediately searched for the key in the bag. As soon as I meet you, I open the door.

"assalamualaikum," I used to say hello even though no one was home.

"wa'alaikumsalam Ma..."

I was surprised to hear Indra's voice from the living room. He immediately approached me while running small.

"Indra's home alone again? Papa where's my son?" I asked while kissing her forehead.

"papa had said he wanted to buy snacks at the Ma minimarket. Indra was told to wait at home."

Ahh, I'm really confused by Mas Ryan's attitude. Indra she let wait at home alone? Does Ryan know I'm coming home? But Ryan didn't know what time I was home.

"Dra dear, when did Papa go? It's old?"

"so Papa went right on Indra watch Spongeb*b. But until the Spongeb*b movie, I hope Papa still hasn't come home."

That long? Buy food at which minimarket? If it was near here it should have met me on the way home.

My heart beats irregularly. Okay enough I need to calm down. There's Indra here and my friends at kosan Intan. Any weird Mas Ryan attitude I'd better ask later.

"son, Mama will go to Aunt Intan's house. Mama wants to do college work. Indra wants to come with Mama? There's Aunt Tina too," I smiled looking at my little whiz face

"mau Ma's. Indra wants to come with Ma," he replied excitedly.

"okay. Mom change clothes first. After that we go straight to Aunt Intan's house."

I'll go to the second floor immediately. Pick up books if needed and change clothes. When I went back down, Indra was apparently ready to pack his toys in totebag.

"any more toys to bring, baby?"

"there is no more Ma. This is all Ma."

He looks very happy to be able to go and play to kosan Intan. Ah, I remember. We rarely go for a walk. Moreover, I rarely go alone with Indra. Naturally if Indra is excited even though only to kosan Intan which is two buildings away.

"no Ma. Indra can. You also carry heavy books."

Duh, his clever babble makes a gemes. Without a second thought I immediately kissed her on the cheek. I held Indra's hand and locked the door immediately.

During the short trip to boarding Intan somehow I really hope to meet with Mas Ryan. I really wish I could just ask you all the things that made me half-dead curious about all the drastic changes in his attitude.

But hope remains hope. Until I got in front of the boarding door, I didn't meet Mas Ryan at all.

"ma, we have arrived at Aunt Intan's boarding house. How do you not say hello?"

Indra's question seemed to awaken me from the daydream.

"oh yes, son. Assalamualaik.. Tans.."

"wa'alaikumsalam... Enter Ana the door is not locked." Shouted Intan from within.

Czechoslovak. I'll go inside right away. I saw that Tina and Intan were still not doing the job. There are actually several packages of snacks already open scattered. There are half the contents even some are finished.

"have not started yet? even on snacking," I laughed at the behavior of my two best friends.

"we are waiting for you, loh sist," Intan reasoned.

"aunty..!" Indra immediately shouted while approaching Intan and Tina.

"wah, Indra is already big," greeted Tina by embracing Indra.

"Indra, how rarely do you play at Aunt Intan's house anyway? aunt Intan kangen loh," Intan did not want to lose kissing Indra's cheek.

"duh, how come you're getting funny Indra. Fat fat cunt."

They are busy chatting. I came over and kissed Indra on the forehead.

"if Indra is here means your husband is alone in the house, huh Ana?"

I just fell silent. Confused what to answer, because in fact Mas Ryan has left Indra alone at home.

"papa was gone before Mama came home" Indra replied innocently.

"oh, if so Indra can be satisfied playing here huh?" Intan seemed happy with the arrival of Indra.

"eh, we're here to do the job together" I reminded.

"the task is also not much of a cyst. Later occasionally Aunty play aunty yes," Tina followed by playing Indra.

"Dira baby, play good here. Mama and Aunt Intan and Aunt Tina want to do the job first."

"yes Ma. Aunt Intan, Indra can play this train-mapping ga?" Indra asked permission while removing his toys from the totebag.

"duhh, may dong Indra be funny," as if dissatisfied earlier kissed his cheek, Intan now pinched Indra's chubby cheek.

"son, if you want anything, say yes."

"well Ma" he answered according to.

We immediately did the job and Indra was still engrossed in his toys. While I occasionally try to keep negative thoughts and feelings about Mas Ryan.

Thirty minutes have passed. During my work I try to behave as usual. Joking as usual and chatting as usual.

We decided to take a break for a moment. We spread our hands and back. Tina and Intan as if unable to contain her curiosity, he suddenly asked.

"Aren't you all right?"

"what's the matter with you, Na?" they both whispered. As if I didn't want to hear.

I didn't think that Tina and Intan were still aware that I was confused. I felt I could hide well.

"there is nothing . You guys just calm down."

"Na, I saw from morning you were dreaming."

"we both talked about your attitude all day" Intan explained.

"actually I didn't feel good until you told me yourself, and I thought we were too scared. But until now you still dream a few times. Does this have anything to do with your husband?" Tina asked carefully.

"it's okay. I'm just not used to the change in Ryan."

"Mas Ryan changed?" Intan started kepo.

"well, changed like her husband Tina too. Which is a little bit funny now. But given the age of our marriage, isn't that natural? After all, all this time our marriage was fine," I explained. I hope they are satisfied and don't think about it anymore.

"Oh.." as if the two of them had agreed to answer.

"yuk is doing the job again. Just a little bit more done. Passion, passion, "I'm trying to shift the topic.

They just smile. I really don't feel good if they also think about my household and worry about me. But for sure somehow my heart felt a little relieved to tell me this little bit of confusion.