It's Not Our Mistake #Princess Story 2
It's Not Our Wrong

"Put" called Giri broke my daydream, "Yes" I replied quickly in shock. "Stop" pinta Giri while holding my hand, "Why?" ask me confused, "Stop if you're tired, if you're sad, if you're disappointed. Stop" he said, puzzling me even more, "I don't know what your problem is right now, but can you let me see you for what you are? Seeing you stop covering up all your feelings with a smile" he continued, "Before meeting you, I was once you at this time. And it's not fun if I compare myself to the present one" he explained, "I'm not going to hide all my feelings with a smile, but I'm going to express them as I feel. It's more human" he said, looking into my glassy eyes. "Well" the sound of my heavy breathing from noon held all unpleasant thoughts and feelings, "I can only let go with that voice" I confirmed if I understood what he meant. "Can we start walking again?" I asked in a seductive tone and Giri replied by embracing me, "Let's finish this journey" she replied cheerfully.

It has been six almost six months I have not heard from Indra, "One semester" I said slowly comparing it to my college days. I am now a student of a well-known private university in Jakarta majoring in Economics. "Not my field" my mind is upset to remember how struggling I was when I went to high school to enter IPA classes to apply for medical school. My relationship with Giri is still in the stage of being good friends, "What I need is a friend, not a girlfriend" my motto a week after the breakup with Indra, so as well as possible I set the distance with men including Andre who has started to contact often since I know my mobile number. The end of the semester begins today, "Put" cried Mama from the first floor who made me rush up to her, "Papa" said Mama as I opened the door to her room, "Papa" my reply was confused to see Mama crying and embracing Papa, "No" my mind was limp to mean Mama's attitude, "Princess turn on the car now" I continued as I hurriedly took the car keys and turned it on. "Wake up Don, get up" cried Mama from inside the ER who I could hear clearly as I entered the room after finishing parking the car. Before long, the nurse came out and approached me "We're so sorry" he said, spontaneously making both legs limp helpless to support the body and make me fall asleep, my eyes began to darken, suddenly there was a sound of people shouting, "Her mother fainted" reflect I remembered Mama and right, the fainted is Mama. I try to get up to hold on, "It's not time for me to fall" my mind assures itself, "If I'm weak, what about Mama" my determination deep down.

It's been 7 days since Papa's funeral, Mama is still helpless in bed. I who since Papa's departure could not shed tears at all, started to become a closed figure. Even my phone never touch, "The battery runs out" I said slowly while attaching the charger cable to the phone and turn it on. "trut trut" the voice of the incoming chat in a tubed, "Where are you? I'm at your college right now" Andre chats this morning, "You where" Giri's last chat this afternoon, which I haven't countered since Papa's departure, "Returning their chat won't make Papa alive anymore" I said selfishly in my heart. "Princess to college berentar ya Ma" said this morning to Mama who is still in the blanket since 3 days ago and not answered. "thiin" the sound of a car horn that suddenly stopped in front of the fence and stopped my car out of the garage, "Giri" I said slowly when looking from the rearview that turned out to be Giri's car. With a feeling of annoyance, I got out of the car. "What do you want this person" I was angry with the little cause that Giri made, "What is this fire" I shouted annoyed and without answering, Giri immediately pulled me into his car. "What do you want?" I asked while struggling to refuse to get into his car, "Shut up, don't ignore me for whatever reason" he replied in a more upset and angry tone like me. The car began to run, I was still stunned because I was shocked by the clash of Giri earlier. Not long after the car stopped in front of Giri's house, "Do you want me here?" ask me confused, "You want us to shout at each other on the side of the road or in the house" he replied, "But" I continued thinking about Mama Giri, "Mama again in Bandung now" he replied while opening the car door. He took me to the back of the house, "Drink this" his door while giving me a can of cold drink. For a long time we were silent, confused to start the conversation after yelling at each other without cause. "I can't be patient anymore with you" said Giri began the conversation with a firm tone while closing his stool right in front of me, "I want you to be my girlfriend, if you allow me to marry you immediately" he continued seriously which made me choke. "Put" worried Giri saw me coughing, "I want to go home" I continued while standing rushing away but held Giri by hugging me from behind. "Quite Put, just torture yourself" he whispered earnestly, "Let me hold some of your burdens", "Let me be part of your sorrows, even though you don't like me much less love me like I like and love you" he continued without hesitation. Hearing Giri's words, my heart was ordinary, there was no feeling of trembling or any sign of attraction. I turned back, facing Giri while releasing both hands that were holding me. "I'm sorry, right now I just want to be alone", "Either until when" I said firmly in a soft tone. "You're a good guy Gir, perfect in my eyes to be a couple. But, I want to learn to express what I feel without a smile" I explained by quoting Giri said at the time. "Put" he replied in a pitying tone, "What kind of demeanor do I look like is a pitiful person with high prestige in his eyes" My inner voice interpreted his reaction to hearing the explanation just now. "I will not repeat my words twice" said Giri still with a slightly upset tone, "It turns out not a pity, but an annoyed tone" I said in my heart to analyze once again his tone, "I will not take a step back, whatever your reasons" he explained with a sharp look and a serious look, "So, don't ignore me" he said but in a soft tone. "Well, I can't guess the contents of his heart and mind" I was confused in his heart. "You don't know what my journey has been like and what I've been through to this day" I said, this time I'll use my own words, not quotes. "It's not easy" I explained if my current physical and mental condition is very tired to be coupled with love problems. "It's not your fault, it's not my fault and it's not our fault" said Giri, who gave me goosebumps, "Everything that happened is on the line, and what has not happened must be tried so that there is no regret for a moment's emotion" he explained, implying that he would not give up on my statement earlier. "It's not our fault" my mind repeats its words, "Can we try together? My life is not easy either, and I want to work through it with you" she asked sincerely, "We're finishing this journey together" she continued in the hope that my heart would soften. "Can't you?" ask me to hesitate, "Can if you allow it" replied Giri confidently. "I won't force you to answer now, but.." she explained that I cut with "no way I'll let you ignore me" I said quickly which finally made us both laugh.