THE ONLY_
CHAPTERS.14.
I drowned myself in a lot of wishful thinking that made me more miserable, oh my god! is not it natural at the age of 18 years I feel the\- adolescence period in love, even most of them must have changed\-change partner \(dating\).
And damn, my heart fell for the wrong person. My learning is just reading what I do, without intending to work on the example of the\-problems that Mr. Ustadz gave me to learn. End this now, don't let these unknowing feelings develop, don't give a single chance to stay in the recesses, even if it's just a speck of despair. NO!!!.
Trying to encourage her heart and realize that none of this should have happened, even I felt my heart tightened more and more, and it was not realized that I was sobbing, sad that's what I felt, even, the first experience of falling in love, but it actually hurts, people say first love is hard to forget, that's what I'm afraid, afraid I can not control myself and I can actually lose with my heart, the state of my heart, then I can screw things up, family, friends, brotherhood. Huft, my God, please take care of my heart so that I don't embarrass myself.
"You okay An?" ratih's question made me realize, that it's not that I'm a creature that is still awake, "hmmm just miss your father" kilahku, because I can't be honest about my condition.
" Tomorrow UN An, if you gag quietly mending prayers An rather than cry, then sleep, do not continue to learn gag will enter" Ratih suggested and right also in my opinion.
Rise from my fall towards the bathroom to take water ablution hope the coolness of the water can treat the wound a little, and hurry to perform hajat prayer finally I decided, mengunajat may UN smoothly, and, and this heart is awake.
Actually that makes me more miserable because I can not tell the state of my heart to anyone, including my own mother who I never hide anything to him, yes but I still have a God where I hope, huft why should be as complicated as this is love, LOVE one word that often makes in lema, love, but I hope that one day there will be an equally great love coming to greet me in order to shift the one name that I myself try not to engrave on my heart.
Today, came my first UN, when the supervisor divided the matter2 replicates, I try to calm down and focus because armed with confidence I learned 2 days with the defending class champion and pak ustadz and lecturer hahaha miris huh?.
I do about 2 with a little ease, yes right said Mba Acha, if we learn at least we know and have provisions, the proof is that I am now working on problem 2 calmly because I understand, not plonga plongo or look forward to someone who cheated, hahaha this is amazing, because Alhamdulillah her I am fluent in doing about2 UN.
"The real madness strained abizzz" said my roommate, obviously this is the first day, what else is the supervisor of another school that we do not know, "original yes. more sinister than the angel of the pluck of life" another son said, I was laughing, rich kid this funny deh, gag so know also the different class, it's different, I'm not including the santri that is popular in my opinion there are no achievements, my friends are also only one room, and one class is also gag all close.
Because I am not the type of person who is friendly, or SKSD, not the type who is arrogant as well si, if anyone wants to be friends with me yes I am the hayuk, I am also not a complicated person anyway, I am also not a complicated person, gag wants to talk about these rumors, and doesn't want to know about other people's business unless they need my help.
Walk the time, which today people feel that time is so fast passing, then make the best use of today because time will never come back again, likewise, I do not feel 3 days have been passed through the\-tense period UN has passed, hopefully what I do produces the results expected.
"I'm the important one to pass first, others think while walking hehe" I said, "don't really do much ande\-ande, afraid of being disappointed buk" he said again and we ended up laughing together, yes the busyness of UN made me a little forget about my feelings that are still difficult to control.
"Assalamualaikum mama" said my mother in the afternoon to contact me, although not every day also mama call, but it's enough for the treatment miss.
"walaikumsalam, how are your children? UN smoothly?" ask mother, yes that's how the mother\-mother, "lumayan Bun, Alhamdulillah can do the problem, so as not to know the results, at least a safe point, hehe" I replied.
"gag papa An, calm no efforts that betray the results, now just fasten prayer, let the help of God"
"always mah Bun, prayer number 1"
"gag in vain did she learn from Mba Acha and her husband? mother would like to thank them An ama"
"heem Bun, and the magic that Anna learned because there were all in the UN, for the most part, the grilles of the ustadz sir also came out all about it" I replied antusian, how the gag became more amazed,,, and,, mother please donk., my mind is really struggling.
"later can study again for the SNMPTN exam, enough An anyone who wants to patiently teach you"
"yes, Mother wants to be free only" aki heard even mother laugh, mother laugh,
"Not An, if Acha's husband asks for payment also the mother will pay kok so expensive, it's important the mother's child is comfortable, learning to enter the mind, safe, that's what the mother wants, it's what the mother wants, how comfortable you are" Yee the mother gag knows what, comfortable where if my heart even often hurts if deket2 ustadz keceh that one.
"Bun, may gag Anna take lessons with friends2, do they list tutoring courses for taking the university entrance exam, its place in the Unsoed campus complex" I tried to negotiate let gag the events of the live show come back, and surely I avoid mr. ustadz to keep my feelings safe under control,
"Why do you want to learn Mba Acha? even comfortable An self-study as sodara, you can be a priority because only you doang who learn, is it even better focus An, if in kurj2 so not many students?"
"The problem is a priority, there is also good Bun, many have been proven, one group of only 3 people, 3 times a week only 2 hours of lessons, let's add more spirit with temen Bun, ama Ratih as well, if in Mba Acha alone even for, kasian mba Acha too, his stomach is already big that way, later getting tired, more tired, not yet mba Acha that is complicated if Anna Dateng, Anna so hitchhiking to eat, not to mention who came home should be anterin pak ustadz, ngrepotin si Bun" my whine, come dong Bun yayin si, ngrepotin si, let the gag grow increasingly afraid this is the business of the heart.
"yes, the important thing is you seriously do not play2 you know learn it, this mother out money again right?"
"Bundaaaa" my whine spoiled, "love u Bun and dad also love full" my screams were happy even though it was a bit like that, so gag met the ustadz again but this is the best.
" Mother hope that An, do not shift the position of Mother Father if later met the tether of heart"
Already Bun, already there, if you know for sure the mother is even more miserable instead of happy her son has grown up to be interested in the opposite sex, my inner voice.
